Sometimes What You Think Will Help Only Makes It Worse.

     Let me start by saying that I love my family very much and I am appreciative of all they do for me. That being said, I wish sometimes that some people would back off. Dealing with depression and all my other mental illness' is difficult enough without having to keep fighting someone you love. I am not going to name names here because that is not what this is about. I want to help others realize that sometimes what they think is helpful really isn't. I have a person in my life who keeps getting mad at me for decisions I am making that they do not agree with. Now these decisions do not have anything to do with my recovery but the subsequent arguing that occurs does, because it takes me 2 steps back. I have been told that they feel I am making poor choices and they have to stop me from doing so. They have made it clear that they are concerned and are worried because I was just in the hospital because I overdosed in an attempt to commit suicide. This has been happening for years. They have been getting angry at me for making decisions they do not agree with even though it does not effect them. I love this person very much but no matter how many times I ask them to stop they won't and it is getting worse. Our relationship has gone from great to not so good and part of that is the fact that I have started to state my own feeling and have stopped just letting them yell at me. Because of this, I was told that our relationship is bad because I keep making choices they do not like. I understand they are concerned but what they do not seem to understand is that they are making it worse. If I disagree I get yelled at. If I yell back I get screamed at. If I can get this person to listen long enough for me to state my feeling I get an attitude if it is not what they want to hear. I am at a point that I get anxious at the thought of talking to them because I know that it will probably turn into an argument. My point in all of this is that if someone you love is dealing with a mental illness. Ask them how you can help and do it. Even if that means keeping your mouth shut. I understand how hard that can be but unfortunately sometimes your best intentions make things worse even if you were trying to make it better. Listen to them when they want to talk and whatever you do, Please do not throw it in there face at a later date. Sometime what I am feeling at the moment is irrational and I think something is going on that isn't. Sadly when I have talked to said person about issues I am having it gets used at a later date to say "see what happens when you don't listen to me" or "did you forget what happened then". That is never okay. It is never okay to continue to hurt someone because you believe you are right and they are wrong. I am sure some of this made no sense and I am sorry for that. Have you ever had someone think they were helping when they were not? What did you do? Did it help the situation? Comment below and let me know.